Heartbeat Weekly (32)

I have been miserable there for a long time now because that place is absolutely toxic. There’s a lot of drama and hypocrisy. If you don’t fit into their little sheep mold, you’ll never be good enough for them. I’m a person who was raised to speak my mind, and I’ve been pulled into the office several times for my “attitude.” I’ve been told I’m mean, and hateful, and “cold.” So I changed my approach. I changed myself. I tried to be nicer about the things I said, because people can’t handle honesty and straightforwardness. I sugarcoated things. I kissed a lot of ass. Did I get acknowledged for that? Hell no I didn’t. And when I brought that fact up, the “lodging manager” (I put that in quotes because she in fact does absolutely NOTHING in lodging – doesn’t even come in to help her staff when they desperately need it. I have zero respect for a manger who sits on her ass all day and watches people on the cameras) claimed she had indeed acknowledged me. Well, I must have been fucking drugged when you did because I have no recollection of that! There’s also another shift lead that I can’t stand because she’s only been there for a year and she acts like she’s the manager. She’s controlling, always has to have her way, and the sad part? Management lets her. Yet she makes mistakes on a daily basis – missing medications frequently, sitting while other people are working, making others do her work for her, placing the blame on the other staff for mistakes that happen on her shift when really she should be checking everything – and never gets any kind of reprimand. The rules apply to some people and not others. It’s disgusting.

All in all, I’ve had enough. I’m sick of being treated like I don’t matter, like my opinion doesn’t matter. I’m sick of busting my ass and doing 75% of the work. I’m sick of trying to speak up about things that are wrong, only to have them fall on deaf ears. I’m sick of lodging (the kennel part of the vet hospital) getting dumped on because we’re “the bottom of the food chain.” We do harder, more physical work than any other department, we’re on our feet all day, and we work in the extreme temps because there is no AC or heat in the main area. But nobody cares about what happens in lodging as long as they’re making money. Even the owner of the building doesn’t concern himself with our problems.

When I started my new job, I told the “lodging manager” at my old place that I wanted to do one 6 hour shift a week. There are TWO other employees who do just that, so I assumed it would be fine. HA. She said, and I quote, “It’s not worth the paperwork.” When I mentioned the other two employees, she said “Well they’ve been doing that for years.” I told her I’d been there more than 7 years. She said she didn’t know why they were allowed to do that, but they’ve decided going forward that they won’t be doing it anymore. (Basically, they just won’t do it for me. They’re not going to change it for either of the other two girls, believe me.) I told her to put me on one double a week for now. She said, “I’m not going to put you on the schedule if you’re going to quit soon. It’s not worth the time spent to re-do the schedule.” (That’s the second time I’ve heard “it’s not worth it” – so basically I’m not worth the effort after SEVEN YEARS of hard work and dedication. K f*ck you too!) I said, “So you’re telling me to quit.” And she said, “Oh, no I’m not saying that.” Well, yeah you are. Because there’s no other option. So I told her that because she’s basically left me no other option, I was putting my two weeks in. She said she was sorry to hear that. It was all I could do to not tell her she was full of shit.

I don’t know why I’m surprised. They did this shit to my mother-in-law, who was the old lodging manager (except, you know, she actually WORKED in lodging. And she actually gave a shit about her staff). They fired her after fifteen years, saying they were doing away with the manager position and breaking it into shift leads. As soon as she was gone they made the manager of client service the manager of lodging, too. Really they fired her because she spoke her mind and the “human resource” manager didn’t like her.