Review: Die for Me by Amy Plum

I’m sorry to say that this is another one that I had to force myself to finish. Through some morbid compulsion, I couldn’t bring myself to put it down. I suppose I was hoping it would get better and have some redeeming qualities, perhaps an unexpected twist or two towards the end, but nope. This book was very predictable. I felt zero surprise, zero joy, and all in all zero emotion. I found myself procrastinating by doing something, anything to avoid reading. I cannot fathom for the life of me how this book has an average of 4.07 on Goodreads. Really.

My biggest complaint was the romance. GAG ME WITH A SPOON. I hate cheesy stuff, but if the romance is done well I can really get into it. But, this book made me feel more likely to blow chunks than to swoon. The ‘relationship’ between Kate and Vincent was not necessarily instaluv, but definitely instasession. As in, helplessly obsessed at first sight. (Lust.) Like, OMIGOSH, he’s so totally hot, I’m so in love with him!! Um, ew. You can’t love someone after only knowing them for a couple weeks.

The other desire warring against wanting to ralph constantly was the urge to punch Kate in the face. She was a cowardly, annoying, spineless, insecure martyr. The first time she and V interact, she gets all embarrassed because she almost left her bag in her haste to get away from him, and when he hands it to her she drops it. OH NOES!!! So terrible!! So embarrassing!!! NOT. Pick up your stuff and walk away. Who cares. And she calls it a ‘stand-off.’ Really? She overreacts throughout the whole book, has insane jealous fits (over a DEAD girl even), freaks out and assumes things at the drop of a hat. So basically? Drama Queen.
Me:

She also makes a comment about ‘falling for him’ after she’s only just met him! The only things she knows about him are 1) he’s hot, 2) his name is Vincent, and 3) LIKE OMGSH he’s so totally hot. That’s infatuation and lust, not love. Instant obsession is not my thing, maybe that’s why I strongly disliked Die for Me. I like the slow burn, when it takes the majority of the book just to work up to a kiss or the first move and you’re practically yelling at him, “JUST KISS HER ALREADY!!!!” This ‘romance’ happened waaaay too fast for me. Not to mention it was disgustingly sappy in a junior-high puppy love sorta way.

“I feel spoiled,” I said dreamily, leaning my head on Vincent’s shoulder. It felt so good to touch him after three weeks with only my pillow to hug.
“Good. That’s exactly what I want you to feel. The only way I can compensate for this extraordinary situation is to make it up to you in an extraordinary way.”
“Vincent, it’s amazing just being here with you. I don’t need anything else.”

“If I am forced to watch Kate Mercier strip down to her undies in my very own bedroom, I’m afraid I won’t be able to answer to Mamie for what might happen.” The huskiness in his voice made me wish, for just a second, that he would follow through with his threat.
Pulling the shirt over my head, I said, “Okay, I’m decent.”
He turned around and looked at me, whistling under his breath. “You’re more than decent! You look practically edible.”

After a makeout session (that almost made me lose my lunch) in which girl loses her control and gets too into it and boy pushes her away to maintain control (sound familiar?):

“I have to warn you that my bedroom isn’t the best place to stage an assault on me. It’s where I’m at my weakest, with my bed a mere twenty feet away. And you look so tempting that I find it very hard to resist taking you to bed here and now.”

Seriously?

There were too many things that seemed cliche and…Twilight-y to me. Girl locks eyes with sexy stranger, he seems dangerous and she knows she should stay away but she thinks about him constantly, boy tries to stay away for her own good but doesn’t have the strength to, she finds out boy is actually undead (and she’s the first girl he’s had feelings for since he became that way) but HEY who cares, she loves him. Irrevocably. Easy, Bella.

Oh yeah and all the, “Oh, Kate!” “Oh, Vincent!” “Oh, KATE!” stuff….shut up already!!! Jeesh, it’s like Titanic all over again: “Jack!” “Rose!!” “Jack!!!!” “ROSE!!!!” OKAY WE GET IT YOU KNOW EACH OTHER’S NAMES!!!! Aye yai yai.

I was unable to produce even an ounce of feeling whatsoever for this book aside from nausea and irritation. Everything seemed forced: the romance, what should have been normal conversation, and especially the sad attempt at humor. I didn’t even crack a smile once (okay, I did, but because I was laughing at the book, not with it). The ‘banter’ was juvenile and lame.
Me in parts that were supposed to be funny:

There seemed to be a lot of plot holes as well, for example: the Numa…okay, they’re the archrivals, but why?? They didn’t really seem to have a real motive other than ‘they’re evil.’ The age addition didn’t make sense to me, either. Vincent died at 18, it had been a year since he died last so he’s 19, but he’s been as old as 23? Guess the age sets back every time they die?? Figure it out for yourself, ’cause you’re not gonna get it explained. The concept of being ‘volant’ wasn’t explained well either, I had to put those pieces together on my own from context.

If you like sappy romances (and don’t have a problem with lack of depth and character development) you might love this. It just wasn’t for me.

Will I be reading Revenants #2? Hell to the no.