I made it a whopping FIVE. PERCENT. Lmaoooo. It was 44 minutes, and I listen at almost 2x speed, so I lasted 20 minutes. 🤣
Which is a shame, because there’s multiple narrators (I *swear* the audiobook said Suzy Jackson in the beginning, and I love her, but she wasn’t listed on the title details so maybe I’m just trippin’ lol) and the first couple were decent. But then it got to the third. I’ll get to that in a minute.
In the first couple of chapters I was mildly intrigued, but honestly it felt kind of generic. It reminded me a lot of the Aurora Cycle. There was also a lot of info dumping on the species/cultures around the universe – i.e. these people dye their hands, these people have red teeth from whatever (I don’t remember, oops), etc; and there was so much that I knew I’d never remember it all. So that was the first strike.
The second strike? They were describing the color system of attire and said that black and gray were for soldiers/bodyguards and brown is for servants. Sound familiar? That’s because it’s a straight up rip off of Red Rising (which is a MASTERPIECE).
Aaaand the third strike was the third narrator I mentioned above. The narrator alone was aggravating because when he breathed he GASPED in a breath and it was driving me bonkers. As if that wasn’t bad enough, the character – Ian, I think but I dunno if that’s how it’s spelled – was also awful. EVERY OTHER WORD OUT OF HIS MOUTH WAS A CUSSWORD. I’m barely exaggerating tbh. In just the first several minutes of the chapter I counted at least 8 cusswords (most of them ‘fuck’) before I gave up counting. I think it was an attempt to make him sound -edgy- but it just resulted in him sounding immature and ignorant. Listen, I curse like a sailor sometimes and absolutely don’t mind it in books, but not when it’s just senseless cussing for the sake of cussing. There is NO reason for ‘fuck’ to be every other word in normal dialogue. I was already considering DNFing when this happened (and this is a real, honest to god quote straight from the audio):
‘Your what the fuck now? I’ve been eye fucking a goddamn princess? That’s a first. But eye fucking is all I’ll be doing, because I fucking hate the ruling families. They’re a load of parasitic assholes who look after themselves and don’t give a shit about the rest of us. And I’m sure if that stick up her ass look-‘
Aaand that is where I rage quit. PEACE OUT.
Threads That bind
I put this down for about a week because I wasn’t enjoying it, and now I have zero desire whatsoever to pick it back up. The concept was interesting, but everything else was lackluster. Despite the unique idea of threads, it was generic and felt very YA. The characters were really bland and I just didn’t care about anything that was happening. Not my cup of tea, I’m afraid.
I can’t do it anymore. It feels like such a chore just to pick this back up and it put me into a reading slump trying to force my way through.
The world building is shoddy at best. I felt like I was thrown into a lake without knowing how to swim. Almost nothing is explained, there’s no map, and I couldn’t grasp the world or its magic system. I felt pretty confused about the world building in general.
The characters aren’t inspiring. I didn’t care about any of them, and the love interest is an asshole?? I usually adore enemies to lovers, but this one didn’t do it for me. They were basically trying to stab or kill each other constantly. I felt zero tension or chemistry to give me hope for the slow burn enemies-to-lovers romance I was promised.
Overall, I just don’t care to continue. The only emotion I felt was ‘meh’ and I’m just too bored to keep trying.
The Only Good Indians
Look, I wanted to like this. It features a Native American MC as well as their culture, which I find interesting. However, nothing about this book was good. At all. Not only was it boring to the point that I found myself zoning out and having to rewind the audio, but the writing is SUPER awkward and choppy. I despised the writing and it made it very difficult to listen to. I couldn’t push myself to go any farther, as I was straight up not enjoying a single thing about this book. I should have been intrigued by the weird ass happenings with the deer, but I just wasn’t, because it was lacking the driving force of anticipation that a good thriller/horror should have.
A Magic Steeped in Poison
There’s nothing glaringly wrong with this, it’s just not my cup of tea. (Har har…sorry)
It felt pretty generic to me, tea doesn’t excite me, and everything about it just feels so bland and meh. The narrator isn’t stellar either, which wasn’t helping. I just don’t think this is going to end up being something I’ll enjoy based on the writing and lackluster characters. I also saw that there’s instalove, which solidifies my decision to DNF.
Shame, though. That cover is so pretty!
A River Enchanted
Listen, I wanted to just push through and finish this because SEVENTY PERCENT but I can’t torture myself anymore. Even speed reading and skimming I’m so bored that it’s making me miserable.
Literally NOTHING. HAPPENED. in the entire three hundred and fifty fucking pages I read. There’s a ‘mystery’ but there’s no air of suspense to drive the story along. Even the audiobook wasn’t enough to hold my attention. In character driven novels I have to actually care about the characters to maintain interest, and I straight up did not give one single fuck about any of them. They were all just as flat and boring as the plot.
This should have been my jam – the concept was awesome – but sadly it didn’t do it for me. I kind of hated the main character, her tone grated on my nerves, and none of the other characters were very inspiring, either. There was really nothing spectacular about this even though it had so much potential. Nothing about this story compels me to continue and I’m not enjoying it, so I’m going to move on.